Today I was walking through the mall because I realized I don't have a suitcase. I guess when I went to China I had borrowed Joel's. Somehow, it took me until today to realize that I didn't have anything to pack my clothes in!
So anyway, I'm walking through the mall and Regan is whining and begging to be picked up. Those of you who know us know that she wants to be carried, sit on my lap, or be somehow touching me at pretty much all times. I have been making her walk more and more because she is 3 1/2 and somedays feels like a ton. Othertimes, I am in a hurry and it is just easier to pick her up and go. As I'm trying to make her walk because I have things in my hands, I realized that this is the last week that my arms will only be devoted to her. That this is the last week that I'll be able to pick her up and carry her without leaving a little boy without a mom to carry him.
I think often about how not only is Shepherd's world about to be rocked, but so is Regan's. Don't get me wrong, we are so looking forward to finally bringing Shepherd into our family, but I also know it is going to be very difficult for Regan and probably myself to adjust. My heart hurts for her because I know that our dynamic is about to change. On the other hand, I also know that we are meant to be a family of three and I love Shepherd dearly. Some people may not understand how you can love a little boy living half way across the world based on a picture and some videos, but I do.
I picked Regan up and carried her through the mall realizing that this is a moment to be enjoyed because not only will my arms be fuller and busier, but pretty soon she will also be too big to be carried.
Just thoughts of the day. I'll post later about Regan and Konnor's week at soccer camp and our Home Depot projects!